Posted by: JulieAloha | August 28, 2010

Pondering Family

Celebrated Katy’s Sweet Sixteen today at Cris & Susie’s home in Kirkland – the first time I’ve gotten to see their new home. Most of the family were present and accounted for with a few handpicked additions. We had a great time, food was excellent, and the conversation even better. We couldn’t have wished for better weather – warm and sunny with a light breeze – it gave us the opportunity to spend most of the time on the back deck and patio. All the “kids” are growing up; Katy is the youngest in this branch of the family and only Jaysen is younger in their generation. It honestly seems like yesterday that Todd, Cris and I were the “little ones.” The way things are going we could be looking at yet another generation in the not-too-distant future – a strange feeling for me as the only one of my generation who doesn’t have children of my own. This may be the only real regret I have. I always thought I would have children, but life just doesn’t turn out the way you think it will. Sometimes it’s been hard to watch them grow up – and I was there at the births of 3 of them – as each year turned and each birthday was celebrated, each milestone passed, I watched and participated in a kind of limbo; the unmarried marriage counselor, the maiden aunt, the fifth wheel – always welcomed and included, but outside nonetheless . Now the eldest of my cousins’ children has graduated from college and I wonder about the children I might have had; who they might have been, what their interests would have been, and where their lives would have led them.  I have been lucky to see my cousins’ kids grow and prosper and I have loved it and them always. Still, I miss them, the children I never got to have.


Responses

  1. Never too late. Have you considered adoption? I think you would make a terrific mom and there are so many kids out there who need love.

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  2. I would love to be able to adopt, but I am unmarried, have a 1 bedroom, 650 sqft condo and currently unable to move – plus I couldn’t afford to support a child on my income. That pretty much cuts my options 😦 However, I’m doing what I can to save $$ so I can afford to move up; I’d like to sell within the next 2 years and get at least a 2 bd/1.5 bath condo that is kid friendly and will let me have a dog. Then I’ll have to see where I am financially. Keep praying for me!

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  3. Aw. Hugs, Julie. I will think good thoughts for the condo upgrade and whatever might come with that.

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