Posted by: JulieAloha | May 4, 2017

365 Gratitude Project – Day 124: Uh-Oh

May 4, 2017

I’ve gotten some scary test results back from my health check yesterday, so I guess I’m grateful to still be alive and functional. Last year I had issues with my health insurance and was unable get my meds for months. When I was hired full-time and benefitted at the Zoo in May I was thrilled… but I procrastinated and didn’t establish a primary care doctor right away. Then I sank into a period of depression brought on by heartbreak last August and everything began spiralling out of control. I no longer cared that my health was poor, I no longer cared about living and for a time I considered not eating any more and just letting diabetes take me out. Over the course of the winter and with help from friends and family I’ve managed to pull myself back to daily living – this blog is part of that effort. I’ve tried very hard to stay positive, both inwardly and out, to focus on the things which make life worth living and my “I’m fine” mask is more genuine now than it was at the beginning of the year. I still have bouts of depression which lead to me not caring about what I eat and not wanting to exercise. To control my diet I’ve tried to cut out bread, eat more veggies, nuts and other legumes, less dairy and limited protein – no fast food, though I’ve indulged in the occasional Starbucks – still there have been days I binged and days I hardly ate at all and I stopped keeping any kind of record last October when my life fell apart. Since January I’ve set a daily walking goal – I started the year with a goal of 6,500 steps a day and increased the goal 500 steps each month – I’m now up to 8,500 steps a day and by August I’ll max out at 10K. I haven’t met my goal every single day, but I’d say at least 65-70% of the time I have. So I’d made some goals and taken some actions and I thought I was doing okay… but I waited until yesterday to go to the doctor…

… I just received my lab results this morning along with a very concerned message from my doctor: after over a year without meds and inconsistent control of my diet my triglycerides are extremely high, my kidneys are not filtering out proteins, and my A1C is 10 – all bad news. So…

This morning, I’ve signed up for a Diabetes Education Class, returned my doctor’s email and changed my Quick Check appointment next week to a full Doctor visit. I measured out blueberries, cauliflower, broccoli, and grape tomatoes by the cup, almonds in 1/4 C containers and I pick up my new prescriptions this evening. I’ll be testing my blood sugar at least twice a day and logging all my results and carb intake. I’m scared, but it’s either give up or get proactive. 

Well, this has been depressing, so here’s some pics and a couple videos of the snow leopards this morning:

P.S. …aaaand there was a glitch with my prescriptions; hopefully I’ll be able to pick them up tomorrow. *sigh*

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